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On the 29th day it occurs to me that there is very likely a reason that doctors are advised not to attempt to diagnose themselves. In the interest of using art and mandalas as a part of the healing process; it might be more effective to do a series of mandalas which do NOT consult the reference materials until the series is complete. It seems to me that in reference to any use of Joan Kellogg's Great Round concepts for interpretation, the work would be a more honest, unclouded representation of the phase or stage of development the person is in at that time.
Stage 6 is considered a confrontational phase in which the individual works to resolve the duality within herself/himself. "We feel ambilvalence as we are forced to confront the paradoxes in our existence and endure the tension of the opposites within ourselves....Complementary colors may appear side by side giving a sense of energetic confrontation." ~Fincher
In my attempts at self evaluation I first look for the stage, then the color meaning, and the meaning of the forms. The blue tip of the left triangle is pointing to the orange tip of the right triangle, which are both at the center of the image. (Keep in mind, I did not even think of these forms as triangles DURING the drawing process. At the time, they were just 'by-products' of a need to divide the left and right circles.) Triangles are said to have some significance in identifying important concerns or direction oriented decisions based on which direction they point and the subject of their gaze.
Fincher's text reminds that the significance may be clearer upon evalution of color choices as well. My color selection here was quite random. As I began the drawing it was facing in a horizontal position with the circles placed and intended simply as a sort of reflection of each other.
So-o-o-o, I went to the color place. I chose the color system associated with chakras as this one is new to me, hence the most "pure" interpretation might be revealed there.
Orange is said to be of the second chakra representing the development of autonomy. Light blue/blue is said to be the fifth chakra, the ability to love without receiving anything in return. "This chakra also has to do with sharing your gifts, talents, and abilities without expectation of reward."
The duality of this particular combination hit a sharp note regarding my current life. In reality my basic autonomy (which is something I am certain that I NEED) is ENTIRELY dependent upon my ability to expect and accept rewards/payment for sharing these 'gifts, talents, and abilities.' I am in the transitional phase of learning to expect monetary payment for the work that I produce in my studio. This is a big adjustment in my life as I have, as many artists do, made art for its own sake for many years. It is not surprising then, that this 'confrontation' occurs at the center of the mandala.
Likewise the reds, associated with basic survival needs, are exactly opposite the green of caring for others. This too, is a prevalent motivating concern underlying most of my decisions. As I am sure this is an inherent concern of the human condition I am not surprised that the two colors were assigned these associations as conflicting entities.
In any case, I proceeded to assess the drawing in this manner after it was completed.
The pros and cons of autonomy weigh heavy at times. In self-diagnosis, I am not surprised to 'find' these conditions in my drawing. It would be interesting to know how somebody, better versed than I, would interpret these images WITHOUT knowledge of my day/life.
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